Saturday, April 5, 2014

Raising Children: Getting From CALM To Wise

By Saleem Rana


Dr. Laura Kastner is a psychologist and writer. She spoke to Lon Woodbury on "Parenting Choices for Struggling Teens," which is a radio talk show that is hosted on L.A. Talk Radio. She talked about raising children by going from CALM to sensible. CALM is an acronym for useful steps a bewildered mother or father could begin to take to establish self-discipline in a troubled teenager. Throughout the radio interview, she explained a variety of sensible methods based on establishing strong self-regulation that mothers and fathers could take when confronted by an angry teen.

Lon Woodbury, the founder of Woodbury Reports, is an educational specialist who has actually worked with parents and rebellious adolescents since 1984. Besides his job as an educational adviser, he is a popular author, and his Parent Empowerment book series are available on Kindle books.

Regarding Dr. Laura Kastner

Dr. Laura Kastner has authored 4 publications on parenting. The first is "The Seven Year Stretch," the second is "The Launching Years;" the third is "Getting to Calm;" and the fourth is "Wise-Minded parenting." She is a scientific psychologist with her very own private practice, and also a University professor, with positions in Psychology, Psychiatry and the Sociology departments at the University of Washington.

The Key to Parenting Kids, Going from CALM to wise

One of the most vital parenting skills a mother or father can learn when it comes to managing children, is getting to CALM, pointed out Dr. Kastner. Self-control is required when a teen confronts a parent, otherwise the situation usually heats up into a shouting and yelling match. Moms and dads have to find ways to preserve their own self-control to ensure that they can actually begin to model self-control for their teenagers.

CALM, she clarified, is an acronym for the steps a parent could use for self-control when in conflict with their adolescent. C is for cool down and focus on your breathing; A is for assessing your choices in the moment; L is for listening closely with compassion; and M is mapping your strategy.

In discussing why most teens behave in such a volatile way, the professor explained that at around the age of thirteen, kids were in the midst of a biological mental change that was hard wired through evolution. Their brains resembled a 'website that was under construction;' in other words, they were beginning the long climb to adulthood and independent living. How teenagers responded to this biological change really depended entirely on their personality. Some were quiet; some looked for trouble and danger; and others were prone to depression. Parents needed to quit acting from their own emotional states, and focus on creating a calm, clear, and assertive parenting style.




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